Holding Back For A Greater Revelation Or Impact

I was thinking an obsession I held onto for a very long time.  Perfect for the current Venus Pluto square.

I was simply wondering why I did this. It’s really not like me.  With Venus square Neptune; I’m far more likely to forget you existed. I also have Uranus in my 7th and I’ve never been clingy.  I’ve also got the Jupiter factor – I’m out of here!  What possessed me to pick up a torch and carry it around for years?

When I finally gave up the ghost, the release I felt was out of this world.  It meant something.

I quit smoking at the same time.  I haven’t mentioned it, recently, but when I young, I smoked like nobodies business. No one, including me, thought I could or would quit.  Mars Mercury, chain smoking and cracking jokes.

I did these things to catapult myself into another dimension.  It worked, by the way.

I wonder, if I subconsciously timed this. I suspect I did.  I had that tape in my car and I’d picked it up more than a few time, considering throwing it out the window… er, not yet!

Transit at the time?  Uranus opposing Natal Venus and Pluto square Natal Pluto.  Sounds like “time” to me!

I think this is applicable to many other things.  Weight loss for example.  I always tell people not to beat themselves up over their weight.  I mean, you can try to not make your problem worse, but big moves like this come in their own time.

When I look back at the whole arc of this, I see no issues with what I did.  I think have very well been stacking the energy of the other, for this type of purpose.

I don’t think I am the only one who might do something like this, unconsciously.

Am I?